Building Great Friendships

Excerpts from a message given Sunday 25th Jan 2009 (Barry)

What is friendship? – “A close trusting relationship between two people”
-Its relationship

Jesus was emphatic when asked what the greatest commandment was, -love God, love others
Read – Mark 12:29

Relationships Jesus is saying are to be at the top of your to –do list,
NOT accomplishments, if these two commands are true

Someone once said:-

The greatest use of time is love
The greatest expression of love is time
The greatest time to love is now
So TIME and LOVE are essential ingredients to building great friendships

But not everyone knows how to and
it’s often tougher than you think

Take a challenge – build 5 new significant friends into your life this year, do it intentionally

Three helpful keys to building lasting friendship:-

1/ Don’t pretend to be perfect
Be approachable
Proverbs 17: 17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

2/ Forgive easily and quickly
Proverbs 27: 6 Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.

3/ Be authentic
Proverbs 22: 11 He who loves a pure heart and whose speech is gracious will have the king for his friend.

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: relationships
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Three Ways to Handle a Crisis

Barry…….

There’s a lot of pressure on people right now, a lot of financial pressure to be exact.
Financial pressure can lead to a personal crisis in your life if not handled correctly.
Two definitions of a crisis are: – a/ A crucial or decisive point or situation; a turning point.
b/ An emotionally stressful event or a traumatic in a person’s life.
Emotionally stressful events often leads us to turning points in our lives, so how can we better handle these situations when they occur either expectedly or unexpectedly.
It’s a promise: into every life, a little rain is going to fall. Some of you are thinking, “I wouldn’t mind a sprinkle now and then, but I’m always under a deluge
. God will use adverse circumstances to grow character in you.
While you wait for that to happen, here are three responses you can have to any crises in your life:

1 / Don’t bury your head in the sand, stay engaged and lead from the front
Don’t run from the situation and don’t pretend the problem doesn’t exist, we often hear talk of leadership and how to lead in the corporate world but we also need to learn how to lead ourselves particularly in times of crisis. In these times, no news is not good news. Communicate constantly with those around you. Tell the truth. Lead from the front and not from the rear, be proactive in your own situation.
James 1:2 says, “Consider it pure joy when you face trials.”
How can we be happy in the problem? Know that in God there is always an answer and a way through, it takes faith though to step out and not be led by events around us but instead be the leader, directing the course and not being dictated to.
Problems in life are inevitable; misery is optional. You cannot stop problems from coming into your life, but you don’t have to be miserable over them.
2 / Seek wise counsel and draw on the people around you
In John Maxwell’s book, The 21 Irrefutable Laws Of Leadership, his Law of the Inner Circle says those closet to you determines your success. This is never so true as in crisis. It’s at this time people need friends who can offer wise counsel, face and tell the truth; a group of people around your life who will give objective advice. There is more wisdom in the people around us then we often realise sometimes they are so close to us we don’t recognise their strengths.
Also know that God is there ready able and willing to help us with wisdom, so pray and ask for help. Ask for wisdom. James 1:7 (Phillips translation) says, “If, in the process, any of you doesn’t know how to meet any particular problem, you only have to ask God who gives generously to all men without making them feel guilty and you may be sure that the necessary wisdom will be given to you.”
Ask God for wisdom so you can learn everything you need to learn through this problem. That way he won’t have to bring it around again. Ask to be a quick learner.
3 / Keep Focused on the big picture and recall your vision
Vision is paramount in a crises
I recently came across this story: -
Wallace Johnson was the founder of Holiday Inn, and a dynamic Christian. When he was 40 years old, his boss fired him from his saw mill job. It came as a devastating shock. This was during the Great Depression. He and his wife needed the income from his job, small though it was. Wallace felt that the world had caved in on him.
His wife worried. She asked him, “What are you going to do?” But Wallace had been thinking, and he answered by saying, “I’m going to mortgage our home and go into the building business.
His first venture was the construction of two small buildings. Within five years, Wallace Johnson was a multi-millionaire. In an interview, he said, “Today, if I could locate the man who fired me I would sincerely thank him for what he did. At the time it happened, I didn’t understand why I was fired. Later I saw that it was God’s unerring and wondrous plan to get me into the ways of his choosing.”

The greatest thing that ever happened to him was to get fired.
James 1:8 says that when you ask for wisdom, “… you must ask in sincere faith, without secret doubts.”
Since problems in life are inevitable, tackle them head on and use them to your advantage.
Know for certain that storms are intense events but they always pass and the sun always shines again, God is on your side so ultimate victory is assured if we don’t give-up

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: Getting a breakthrough
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Seven keys for making a comeback

Message given by Barry-  Sunday October 26th  9am and 10.30am services
How do you get up when you’re down
How do you respond when you experience failure. Each person has a different response, and that response
has a greater impact on your future than you realise.

Micah 7 vs 8
8 Do not gloat over me, my enemy!
Though I have fallen, I will rise.
Though I sit in darkness,
the LORD will be my light.

When You’re Down – Seven important keys to remember –

1/ God loves you unconditionally
when failure comes into our lives somehow we connect it
to a belief that God only smiles upon the successful and
prosperous people of this world. Nothing could be further
from the truth. The Apostle Peter failed Jesus at a time
when the He needed him most, yet we find to our amazement
that Jesus still loved him and restored him into the call upon
his life.
Romans 5 vs 8 we read -
“8But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:
While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

2/ God still has a plan for your life
that plan hasn’t been aborted so long as you still draw
breath on this earth. Circumstances might be depressing
you but its very unlikely those same circumstances are
depressing God. You just need a change of perspective.
Jeremiah 29 vs 11
11For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD,
“plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give
you hope and a future.

3/ Believe that you will still see the goodness of the Lord
When storm clouds envelope our lives we often think this
storm or this situation is going to stay with us forever and
any hope of seeing God’s blessing has dissipated. Storms
by nature are temporary events usually of great intensity
but short duration, know that if you hold to your God given
course you will sail out of that storm.
David of Old Testament fame had seen more than a few
storms says this – Psalm 27 vs 13 -
“ I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.”

4/ You can repent
That’s right you can repent at any time, God is still in the
forgiving business, even if your gloom is a result of your
own foolish actions.
Lets face it sometimes we really get it wrong big time
and think will God ever forgive me? It’s probably not the
biggest sin He’s ever seen but that’s not the point, the fact
is you must not close the door to God’s forgiving power
through Christ it’s there for you for times like this.
1 John 1 vs 9 puts it this way, -
8If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and
the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful
and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all
unrighteousness. 10If we claim we have not sinned, we
make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in
our lives.

5/ Trust in the Holy Spirit
If you’re in a mess then you probably need more than
your own strength and ability to extricate yourself.
The Holy Spirit has been given to us for a purpose.
When I was young I was in a church that had this verse
printed on the front wall behind the pulpit.
Zechariah 4 vs 6
‘Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’
says the LORD Almighty.”
Holy Spirit power is there and available at your time
of crisis

6/ Give out of your need
So often our gloom is a result of not having enough,
- enough money, enough friends, enough whatever,
well that’s the way we see it anyway.
Try this, – out of the very area you struggle in find
something to give to somebody worse off than you,
if it’s friendship you lack find a desperately lonely
person and give them your friendship, amazing things
will happen I guarantee you.
Jesus put it this way, – Luke 6 vs 38
“Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure,
pressed down, shaken together and running over,
will be poured into your lap. For with the measure
you use, it will be measured to you.”

7/ Praise God in Faith
Yes praising God does actually work, you sure don’t
feel like it when you’re in a hole but if you can engage
faith not feelings and start thanking Him for what He
has given you, your despondency will soon turn around.
Praise breaks the chains and opens the door to the
miracle you need
Acts 16 vs 25
“About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and
singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners
were listening to them. 26Suddenly there was such
a violent earthquake that the foundations of the
prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors
flew open, and everybody’s chains came loose.”

Step out and apply these keys, – and experience a turn around in your life

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